Take It Back

Jimmy Buffett said it best when singing about the America’s cup…





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Big Week For Cascadia


It took me awhile to figure out my posts were not going up and that I had fucked up something big on the website. I guess by running an update I broke a bunch of stuff…anyway… I’m back just in time for the big ‘derby’ tomorrow.

So…the Timbers have shown few bright spots since we beat s**ttle last time. John Spencer was fired, Troy Perkins was shipped to Canada and our million dollar player Kris Boyd is now starting on the reserve team. We hired a new coach who is not physically ‘here’ while seemingly giving Gavin instructions via mobile phone.

A victory tomorrow would secure us this years Cascadia Cup but it would not necessarily ‘salvage the season’ as Gavin says;

“It’s a very, very important game for the organization. Especially with the way our season has gone,” said Gavin Wilkinson, Timbers general manager and interim coach. “It’s one way to try and salvage this season. It means a lot from a lot of different angles.”


I will admit that it would ease some of the sting from such as embarrassing season. It will be interesting to see if Gavin rolls out the same starting 11 we have been using for the last 3 matches (minus Steve Smith due to suspension).

Anyway, I don’t remember what I wrote earlier in the week so I will leave it short.


Official match- day preview here.

John Strong’s notes here and Talk Timbers podcast here.

If you are planning on getting in line early and getting a wristband, here is the info from the TA. (5:30am!)

Check out the TA shout out in the Wall Street Jounal.

Finally for today, give the new 5MTKO a listen!


I am going to see if this posts and try to fix the other broken bits…

-See ya tomorrow!

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Timbers v Colorado – Caleb Porter Named New Timbers Manager


Its a nice day for a Timbers match! Lots of stuff to get through including a new head coach, Caleb Porter.

Porter has coached for seven seasons at the University of Akron and built a powerhouse college team. Lots of his players have gone on to play MLS including Darlington Nagbe. He will continue to coach Akron through this season and will be officially brought on in December, his statement;

“I am truly excited and honored to be provided this unique opportunity to coach the Portland Timbers, an organization that in a short-time has established itself as a model franchise in Major League Soccer,” said Porter. “I know that Merritt and Gavin are committed to long-term success for the Timbers and come December, I will be completely focused and driven to continue building a professional club in which the Timbers supporters, city and organization will be proud of. In the meantime, out of respect to the Akron program, I will not be commenting further on this matter until after the conclusion of the 2012 college season.”


Plenty of time to discuss that but for now the Colorado Rapids are in town for the first of back-to-back matches we play against them. The last time we went there in June they beat us 3-0 just after our big win over S**ttle.

Tonight we need to see the same effort from the boys as we did against Vancouver.


Merritt Paulson was on ‘Extra Time Radio‘ arguing about the timing of John Spencer’s firing and the Porter hire. I want to know what exactly happened between them, him saying ‘there was an issue and it merited a move’ makes me wonder even more.


Jeld-Wen field will be widened by4 yards after the season, Gavin spoke of it saying;

“It’s something that will be a natural development for us as a team,” Wilkinson said. “I think coming in as an expansion team we wanted a tight area in which to play to feed off the emotion. And also until we had quality pieces on board, not allowing too much space to play was potentially a positive for us.”


Finally for today, Ticketmaster will no longer be handling the Timbers ticketing, Yay!

On that high note I will leave to get my work done so I can leave early for the match, see ya there!


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New Coach? No Ticket Price Increase!


Quick one.

Coming off a great 2-1 win Saturday night over Cascadian rivals Vancouver Whitecaps the Timbers are about to announce some news.

The Oregonian crack staff have got word that Caleb Porter (coach of Akron’s men’s soccer team) has been offered the coaching job.


It also seems that we will not get a price hike in tickets this year as Merritt himself said;

“Not a single ticket, not a single section.”


I want to say thank you Merritt for making the right move here

The same article claims that Gavin will see out this season as head coach regardless of who and when we hire the new coach…ugh.


-More soon

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Timbers v Vancouver – Cascadia Cup You’re Our Only Hope


The infrequent updates are because I am still prioritizing my summer fun over writing about this Timbers team in despair… I can’t let Gavin bring me down.


The Timbers will be back at home tomorrow playing a very important match against Vancouver. In a season that has been complete shit the only thing left we have to fight for (except the first draft pick) is the Cascadia Cup.

The last week has been filled with more of the fans calling for Gavin’s head (after another road loss to NY Redbull) and has ended with Merritt defending Gavin and calling fans idiots & morons via twitter.

The disgusting thing about this is his lack of perspective while asking for perspective, the condescending tone and this inability to respect any criticism. I can only imagine what it is like to work for someone like that and it smacks of elitism and defensiveness. I have personally had a ‘spat’ with him on twitter and the same scenario plays out over and over again, he just can’t understand HOW ANYONE could think differently.

It reminds me of Romney saying that he looked through his tax returns and has not payed less than 13% …BUT DON’T FORGET ALL THE MONEY HE DONATED TO CHARITY (i.e. the Mormon church).

The parallels between Merritt and Mitt Romney are beginning t0 show in the out-of-touch statements these ultra-wealthy men make. Born with a silver spoon in your mouth certainly creates a sense of entitlement and a with these guys also a bit of a chip on their shoulders. These rich boys have made themselves more unlikeable by assuming that people think the same way as them and can not fathom someone who does not. Furthermore they become irritated when questioned and resort to calling people idiots and morons because they don’t understand the silver-spoon-life, where you are always right and everyone is out to get your money and give it to welfare mothers.

  • when we win a cup I hope the same morons starting this movement line up to kiss gavin’s ass.


  • nobody is more frustrated w results than me and gw has made some mistakes but he’s done a ton of good and a lot has gone on that nobody sees. Making him a scapegoat and calls for heads in our 2nd year in league is bush-league. Need some patience. Firing more people is not what’s best for team. Gavin has respect of players. Mcauley has been a great add and we are on verge of hiring a terrific coach. If its like this next year than go ahead and call for his head. If I thought it was him who was the issue than it would have been different presser at midseason.


  • what I see is a whole bunch of idiots embarrassing themselves. Make it #MPout …gw’s not going anywhere.



So I have come to the conclusion that Merritt is just as much to blame for this horrible 2012 Timbers season as Gavin is.


As for the match against Vancouver, we will need to see some more of that attacking football that Gavin breeds. I sure hope we can win this and take a little something from this season.

Some history of the rivalry as told by Bruce Eaton is worth watching here.


Finally for today, the details for S**ttle away have been released and can be found at the TA site here.



I’m done for now,

-Peace in the middle east.



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Toronto FC vs Timbers – Hope In A Hopeless World


For me the bonus to the Timbers season being over already is I can spend more time playing in the park, fishing, floating rivers, camping, hiking, bbq’n, shooting, skating, neglecting this blog and generally enjoying this NW summer.

The Timbers are in Toronto with hopes of getting their first road win against a TFC team that will be without some players. It shouldn’t matter for them as the Timbers have already thrown in the towel and will be spending these last matches experimenting with different lineups and personal… all without a head coach firmly in place.

I know as a fan I don’t really know what goes on behind the scenes but it is very hard to believe that Merritt has anyone besides Gavin to consult with. In my opinion as an owner he needs to expand his inner circle to include some more experienced MLS minds. It continues to baffle me that Gavin’s resume passed by Merritt’s eyes and he said, ‘this is the guy I want in control of my brand new shiny MLS club’.

Anyway, the hatred toward Gavin has been growing in the last few weeks and I don’t think it is unreasonable but maybe Merritt needs to take some of the blame as well. Gavin talks about the Toronto match in a video here. It seems everything is just peachy.


I am going to crush out some work so I can leave early and watch the match even though I feel hopeless with this current regime running things.

I will leave you with this inspirational video to cheer you up.


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Mike Chabala Out, Ian Hogg In


We have some more player movement today…Mike Chabala has been shipped to DC for a 2014 first round draft pick. It’s a pretty minor move as Chabala had failed to crack into the starting lineup and his playing time dwindled. In my opinion he was never good enough and only served as a stop-gap late last year for our cesspool that is left-back…he did have good taste in tacos though.


The left-back cesspool you say?! Well we got New Zealand’s international left-back, Ian Hogg joining the team for the rest of the season. Could he prove to be the answer to the single biggest problem we have had since the team was created? Who knows, I can’t even begin to trust Gavin anymore ever and the fact he is a fellow New Zealand’er makes me think he is probably a friend of the Wilkinson family. This move just adds to the rumor that Gavin is vying for head coach of New Zealand, he describes Mr. Hogg;

“Ian is a young, talented left back with good athleticism and a desire to succeed,” Wilkinson said. “We have signed him through the remainder of the season and look forward to closely evaluating him as we move to next season.”


Fingers crossed that this dude is the answer.


Merritt took to twitter and responded to the ‘pitchforked mob’, of course most the tweets were deleted. Here are my favorites;

regarding the trade of Troy Perkins…

Troy has meant a lot but he’s not Petr Cech. People making him something he’s not

and on Gavin…

he’s taking tons of heat and accepts it. but a lot more to story than what’s seen from outside

In reply to someone talking about the state of the FRONT OFFICE;

state of locker room is extremely happy, despite record. no offense but i have a better feel there than your buddy in elevator


And finally for today he hinted at the announcement of the new coach;

we will have news on that front sooner rather than later. progress has been much faster than expected. maybe announce in Sept


For now, “Gavin take the wheel”.

That may be my two-stick for the next home match.


-Peace out



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Troy Perkins Traded To Montreal For Donovan Ricketts – Real Life Football Manager 2012


It’s so depressing to think about the Timbers right now. The front office is doing everything it can to alienate me from my favorite pastime (going to Timbers matches) and the hits keep coming.

In a surprising and bizarre move today the Timbers traded goalkeeper Troy Perkins to Montreal Impact for their keeper Donovan Ricketts. Gavin is calling it an ‘upgrade’ but we know that is his standard jab at players leaving. In fact, Gavin expains that the move is NOT an upgrade but a move to give Jake Gleeson the job.

It’s an upgrade,” said Gavin Wilkinson, Timbers general manager and interim coach. “Ricketts is a very good professional, a great person, and in my mind, a great goalkeeper.”

Ricketts accepts that he’s a mentor for those two. One day one of those two is going to surpass where he is,” Wilkinson said. “Looking at Jake and looking at Joe, we have the confidence that one of those two is going to develop into a starting goalkeeper within the next two years.”


I don’t see any reason to make this move unless you hand Gleeson the #1 spot in goal. We have always realized that our future keeper would probably be Gleeson in a couple years but we also know we need proper cover until then.


This whole season feels like Merritt is playing a losing game of Football Manager 2012. It smacks of confusion, desperation, knee-jerkery and worst off, hopelessness.

After a year and a half the team is being exploded by a unbelievably uninspiring and under-qualified GM/Coach. The same one who built it.


I don’t know what else to say except I am annoyed and hate writing this blog.

Congratulations to Montreal, Troy is a good dude and I will miss him.


-Stay on the sunny side.


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